The Cranking Widgets Blog

Being born and raised in southern California has its benefits. I can be at some of the most beautiful beaches in the country in less than an hour by car. I can also (during winter) spend a couple of hours on the road and be in just the right spot for some pretty respectable skiing. Hell, I live in a county that had it’s own teeny bopper television show, for Pete’s sake.

But all this pales in comparison (in my humble opinion, anyway) to the fact that I live only a scant 3.5 hours from Las Vegas, Nevada. And while I’m not a “Vegas kind of guy” per se, they do have several things to offer that are somewhat hard to come by around where I live – legal gambling being the most obvious. And coupled almost inextricably with Vegas-style gambling is drinking.

For those of you who have never been, drinking in Vegas can work one of two ways. You either buy your drinks from the bar like you would pretty much anywhere else, or you play the games (either slots or table games) and you get the drinks for free (though, a gratuity is customary and good practice). If you go the latter route – and you should – there is a rule you need to be aware of:

The frequency with which the cocktail server visits you is directly proportional to the stakes of the game you’re playing.

In other words, the guy playing Black Jack for $50 per hand is going to get drinks much more frequently than the grandma playing the nickel slot machine (which is typically located near the outer rim of the gaming area). If you’re like me and don’t have a sack of 20’s lying around that’s earmarked especially for gambling, you’ll probably find yourself in the second group more often than the first. But, fair gamblers, don’t lose heart – there is a way to get the service enjoyed by the rich folk…

The first time the cocktail waitress returns with your first round of drinks, give her an obscene tip. I’m talking $20 or more (especially if there are several drinks). This, coupled with a healthy dose of gratitude will put you on her A-list for as long as you’re sitting there. Not only that, but once you’re in her good graces, you can get away with things like ordering multiple drinks for a single person. And as long as you still tip her each time she comes around with beverages ($1 per drink is a good rule), they’ll carry you out of that place, completely ‘faced, and you’ll still have cash in your pocket (unless you went bust at the low-limit tables).

I’m telling you, this works. I’ve done it many, many times. But I can still smell your skepticism, so let’s do a little number crunching:

Let’s say that your “comfortable” amount of alcohol is 4-5 drinks (one shot, one cocktail, one beer, one glass of wine) over the course of a night. The average well drink (meaning you don’t order a specific type of alcohol – i.e., “Vodka Tonic” as opposed to “Grey Goose and Tonic”) in a Vegas bar will run you anywhere from $6 to $10, depending on the drinking establishment. For round numbers, let’s say that you’d pay $8 for a well drink, including the standard $1 per drink tip. Continuing this way, your nightly drink cost will end up looking something like this:

5 Drinks @ $7 per drink = $35 + $1 tip x 5 Drinks = $40

Now, using my method:

$20 one-time tip + 5 x $1 tip per drink = $25

Not rocket science, obviously. So, the next time you’re in Vegas, give this a try.

Special Bonus Vegas Tip:

I have it on good authority that tipping 100% of your tab at the Kahunaville bar in the Treasure Island hotel will earn you free drinks for the entire night (or day, depending on your level of commitment). Your mileage may vary.

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